No Room for Hatred in My Faith, by Revd. Andy | NOH8 Campaign

Am very pleased to have my submission to the Be Heard section of the NOH8 Campaign's website featured.

My journey as a gay Christian, and an ordained Anglican Priest, has been an interesting and - at times - a painful one. It's been a journey of discovering who I am, and who I was created to be. As a gay Christian, it saddens me that I sit in the middle of two communities that are often at war with each other. However, I've gradually learned that I needn't be apologetic for being gay, or for having a faith. It saddens me that there are so many people who use their faith as a justification for their bigotry, and seek to belittle, ostracise or oppress the LGBT community. That's not the expression of faith that I have, and it is for this reason that I posed for the NOH8 Campaign ... there is no room for hatred in my faith, and there shouldn't be room for it in our communities.
-Reverend Andy

No Room for Hatred in My Faith, by Revd. Andy | NOH8 Campaign

The Drag Circuit & the Imperial Court System ...

One of the things that made a big impression on me during my stay in San Francisco was meeting some of the area's drag queens and seeing how much money they raise for charity and how hard they work in their communities.

I had no idea that there is an Imperial court system in place for American, Mexican & Canadian drag queens, and was extremely impressed at how organised the structure is, and how much of a support the system is to those inside and outside it.  They support a number of charitable organisations and - in addition to their fundraising shows and events, they donate of their own time, talents and possessions to support their communities and those in need.

As I reflected in one of my earlier posts, to illustrate the power of embracing this community and their community ethic, during my stay in San Francisco, I learned of St. Aidan's, an inclusive Episcopalian congregation in San Francisco that welcomes the local drag community into their midst and the drag community is encouraged to fund raise on their premises. The congregation of St. Aidan's has also raised funds for the drag queen's chosen charities. As a result of this mutually beneficial and generous relationship, the drag queens in turn largely funded the parish's food pantry for an entire year.  To me, this is an example of the potential power that true inclusion holds to work for good in our communities.

I was trying to find the right words to explain a little bit more about the Imperial Court system, but decided that, rather than offer misleading information, it would be best summarised by simply quoting a leaflet I was handed at the coronation ceremony for the Alameda Ducal Court I had the privilege of attending before I left San Francisco:

About Latinos and the Imperial Courts

The International Imperial Court System of the United States, Canada and Mexico was established in 1965 by a Latino, Jose Julio Sarria.  There are Imperial Court chapters in over 68 cities within the United States, Canada and Mexico.  Jose, who is now 91 years old and retired, appointed Nicole M. Ramirez, a well-known gay Latino activist, as his successor in 2007. 

The Imperial Courts welcome everyone as members; gays, lesbians, transgender, bisexuals, heterosexuals, friends and family.  The Imperial Courts membership is based on a Royal Court, with Dukes, Duchesses, Prince, Princess, etc., and is headed by an elected Emperor and Empress.  Imperial Court memberships are all volunteer ... no one gets paid.  The Imperial Courts hold events in the LGBT Communities and raise funds for charities and many causes, including children's charity concerns and student scholarships.

For more information, visit www.impcourt.org 

Equality in Kansas

I had the opportunity to visit Kansas last week, and jumped at the opportunity ... After all, it'll be at least another ten years before I get another period of extended ministerial development leave, and the opportunity to visit Kansas may not present itself next time.

Why Kansas? Because it's home to two people I've been interacting with online for a while now, regarding equality, equal rights and the church ...

Firstly, Sarah Manley (writer of the Nerdy Apple blog, amongst other claims to fame) and I started chatting online after her blog went viral, and found ourselves exchanging ideas on equality. I love her sense of justice, and her humour and sarcasm, and that she is also a fantastic straight ally for the LGBTQ community. A straight ally is a powerful and lovely thing, and we always need more.

Secondly, Matthew Vines, who I started chatting to and exchanging messages with after his YouTube video about the Bible and homosexuality went viral.  Matthew's video is detailed, precise and a great resource, but is only the beginning.  As someone who has experienced homophobia, and been kicked out of the parish I was serving my curacy in, because the rector had a problem with me being gay, I was grateful to have access to an online tool that I could refer people to, and enjoyed messaging Matthew, and watching the growth of his ministry.

Both Sarah & Matthew have been an encouragement to me, and when the opportunity to take a short trip to Kansas presented itself, I decided it was one I couldn't miss.

It was exciting to meet Sarah and her husband, "The Detective" ;-) , to learn more about the paths we'd walked that helped shape our attitudes to inequality, and to get to know each other better, over copious quantities of affordable, good, BBQ food. We were the last three to leave the restaurant and I left grateful, encouraged (& stuffed).

With Sarah

In order to meet Matthew, I would have to drive right by Topeka, and I had a morbid curiosity about stopping off to look at Westboro Baptist Church (infamous for not having anything positive to say about anything or anyone, and for picketing soldiers' funerals, and praising God for the death of everyone except themselves).  I was intrigued, but also apprehensive ... having had such a positive inclusive time so far, I didn't want expose myself unnecessarily to homophobia (it's all unnecessary, but there's enough homophobia in daily life, politics, society and media, without looking for more).

On Matthew's suggestion, however, I stopped by the Equality House (which is across the road from WBC), & knocked on the door, not really knowing if it was a private home or an office (the answer is, both!).

I was met by, and welcomed in by Amelia and Aaron, and found out more about their ministry, about how they're helping to bring hope and a positive message to an area often shrouded in negativity. I learned that the Equality House is a charity, and very much needs the support of others, in order to continue offering themselves in this way. If you have the means, please do consider supporting them financially. If you don't have the means to give financially, support them with your prayers and by making more people aware of them, or by holding a fundraiser for them.

The Equality House

Interestingly, because I so enjoyed the Equality House and chatting with Amelia and Aaron, I nearly forgot that I wanted a photo of Westboro Baptist church, and quickly snapped one before rushing off. Their ministry turned a stopover in the same street as Westboro Baptist Church into a positive experience.

A sad group of people, centred around an angry, xenophobic old man.

With that done, I continued on to Wichita, and it was great to finally meet up with Matthew in person and discover the mind and person behind his studies and video, and also to learn more about the Reformation project, that has come out of that initial video. The Reformation Project aims to offer intensive training to people, to help them counter homophobia in their communities and congregations.

It was lovely seeing how excited Matthew is by his ministry, and how it energises him. The fight against homophobia and for recognition and equality so often exhausts us, that it's energising to meet someone who themselves is excited by it.  When the Reformation Project outgrows it's Wichita base, it'd be lovely to look at bringing it over to the UK, and I'll continue to watch Matthew's progress with interest.

With Matthew Vines in Wichita

I'm so glad I got the opportunity to meet up with Sarah & the Detective, & Matthew, and to have the opportunity to add to what has already been such a positive experience in San Francisco on this sabbatical.  It's incredible how I've gotten to know most of my contacts for this Sabbatical over the internet, (thank you, Sir Tim Berners-Lee!) and it's been fantastic to get the chance to meet them, and learn so much from such great people.

Inclusive church in the community

Following on from my earlier post about an inclusive church service, in addition to attending a service, I had the pleasure of seeing the inclusive church in action in the community yesterday, as well.

I had been invited by Diana, to go and share in a picnic lunch on a blanket in Dolores Park, San Francisco, which was also an opportunity to offer spiritual advice to the local community.  Because of location, obviously much (if not most) of the local community is made up of members of the LGBT community.  Because it was warm and sunny, the park was full of people making the most of it ... there were people eating and drinking with friends, catching the sun, enjoying ballgames, walking dogs (and even a kitten!), holding hands, and relaxing. It's sad that I feel I need to add that last sentence, in case people think that gays in a park must automatically mean cruising, and it's sad that people who may assume that can't see the bigotry behind that assumption, or fail to recognise that - even if that were the case - that many straight people do it too (reference the Channel 4 documentary on 'Dogging').

Anyway, the group of us that gathered included a Deacon, two monks, a drag queen, a Rector, an Archdeacon, and myself.  We set up blankets, food and a sign advertising that we were offering spiritual advice. Although we didn't get much interest in the spiritual advice that day, we did have a guy come over who shared that the advice he'd received previously had really helped. He was walking by, collecting donations for the AIDS walk in a few weeks, so he was giving back to the community.  We also had a few people come over to say hello to some of our group that they knew, and there was no shame in doing so.

My experience of ministering to the LGBT community back home is that - often - they don't want to be seen to be talking to a person of faith, because of the LGBT community's experiences of faith communities; how they've been vilified and ostracised, or at best - allowed into our churches or groups, and demonised and dehumanised.  So, the two communities often have an inherent distrust of each other, which can make it very difficult to offer any authentic ministry to the LGBT community.

It was lovely to be gathered with such a diverse group in the midst of a very diverse community, and - once again - to be there with a sense of pride at being able to be present in a community without a sense of apology and guilt.  We were there because we genuinely wanted to help and affirm them for their sake, not because we wanted to change them into what we thought they should be, or because we wanted them to join our churches.  This was about them; helping them to make sense of their lives and their key life moments, and offering advice to help them become who they were created to be.

The ministry on the blanket had a sense of validity, through the hard work of the colleagues and friends I was gathered with ... they have spent a long time working in the community, and because of that, were able to be there without any sense of animosity or suspicion, which I think would be the case if a church group suddenly placed themselves in a park in the UK where the LGBT community was gathered to enjoy the sun. Through the way it has treated members of the LGBT community, the Church in the UK (capital 'C'), has largely lost it's credibility with the LGBT community (and it's not hard to see why).

My experience on Sunday was that it was both energising and inspiring to be in the midst of a community that had spent so many years in the margins, not as superiors, but as members of that community, offering ourselves and our ministry to them, and to have them view us without animosity.  We were simply an equal part of the community.

On the blanket in Dolores Park, offering ministry to the community gathered.

On the blanket in Dolores Park

After we left Dolores Park, Tommy, one of clergy invited me to join him in Aunt Charlies Lounge, one of the Drag clubs, to meet some of the Drag Queens he knows, and has ministered to (and with!). These ladies are part of the Grand Ducal Court of San Francisco, and I had the opportunity to chat briefly with a view of them, and met the reigning Grand Duchess, Paloma Volare.

These ladies obviously knew Tommy well, and had respect for him, and it was mutual.  They greeted each other with affection, and I learned of how these ladies worked extremely hard to raise funds for charity.  What was incredible to see was how his church and these ladies worked so well together, for the benefit of the local community.

They had raised most of the funds for his church to run their food pantry for a year, providing food to people in need.  However, he and his congregation had also helped raise funds for their charity concerns, which include AIDS charities, food charities, cancer charities, a community centre, and a nighttime ministry.  The Grand Ducal Court of San Francisco, of which these ladies are a part, raises around $50,000 annually for these charity concerns.  Tommy had helped them with that, and they share a concern for the local community, and are ministering together.  Tommy's church had included them in other ways, by offering ministry to them when they lost a dear friend, and by welcoming them into congregation functions, sometimes in drag, where they were celebrated and allowed to use their gifts.

This is another example of how much further inclusivity should go than merely stating that LGBT people are welcome.  This morning's church service I attended and these examples of inclusive church active in the community are examples of being truly inclusive, where people's diversity is celebrated, and the beauty and the gifts that they bring are encouraged and used for the benefit of the community around them.

Some photos of some of the ladies of the Grand Ducal Council of San Francisco

I'm not for one minute suggesting that there aren't other forms of inclusivity, or that these are the best expressions of an inclusive church at worship and in the community ... after all, it's a big world out there.  I'm speaking from my perspective and experiences, and obviously mentioning my impressions of what I've seen and how it's impacted on me.

What struck me was how much good can be done in the community and for the kingdom, when people are included as they are, affirmed as they are, and encouraged and enabled to use their gifts, without having to feel shame, without feeling that they can't let people see who they really are.

This is a very good example of what the inclusive church looks like in the community.

What does an inclusive church service look like?

On Sunday, 7 July, I experienced several different forms of inclusive church.  This post will focus only on the first part ... the church service I attended.

I started the day at St Gregory of Nyssa, San Francisco, a community that actively advertises itself as inclusive of the LGBT community, reaches out to poor people (amongst other things, they run a food pantry where tons of groceries are shared out every week, and where those who come to get food items are as welcome in worship as they are for the food pantry!), and where people on the fringes in other parts of the Church are celebrated and included, not just in being welcome, but have the opportunity to use their gifts in positions of leadership.  The worship space is in two sections, one section they use for the service of the Word (the readings, prayers & sermons), and the second section for the sacraments (the communion, or Eucharistic prayer).

The service involves lots of congregational singing, without instruments, and elements of the worship service are brought in from around the globe, with music bells and chants from other countries, and references to other cultures in items scattered around the church and also used in worship.  The congregation sing most of the liturgy, and are encouraged to interact in other ways (such as touching the Scripture which is processed through the congregation after the readings, sharing their own understandings of the topic for the week with each other after the sermon has been preached, and offering up their prayers).

After the Word part of the service, the congregation sings and dances together to the altar, and gather around the central altar, and are surrounded by paintings of contemporary and traditional saints ... giving a sense of everyone being gathered together.  The communion prayer includes more congregational singing, led by the choir, and the congregation are all invited to receive bread and wine, and to share it with each other.

I think that St. Gregory's own website can perhaps explain it in better detail than I have ... this is mixed in with my impressions.  You can see more here.

Obviously, because of my context, what impressed me, was how LGBT folk are publicly encouraged to come and join in the community (even their business cards make mention of it - see below!), rather than the whole 'cloak and dagger' approach in the UK, which is too often the case.  In the UK, there are LGBT inclusive churches, but in many cases an inclusive member of the clergy is not backed up by an inclusive congregation, or vice versa.  So many LGBT folk may find a clergy person who is inclusive, but they can't be seen to be LGBT by the rest of the congregation, and so are able to attend ... but not able to be themselves.

A montage of the front and back of two of St Gregory of Nyssa's business cards

The other thing that impressed me is that there is no secret made of who is LGBT in the congregation ... they are able to mention their same sex husbands or wives in the prayers, ministry is offered to their whole families, and they are able to be in positions of leadership, and to use their gifts and passions to serve the church.  The other thing that I should make mention of is the fact that this was a congregation like any other - people were celebrating wedding anniversaries, praying for sick or dying loved ones, giving thanks for the blessings they'd received, they sought to apply the Scriptures to their lives, and shared bread together. They work for the good of the local community and are involved in the wider church.  There is nothing there that validates the unfounded fear that allowing LGBT people into the church will turn church into a singles club, or a dysfunctional camp bitch-fest (too late for that, many would say, the straight clergy already do that!), or somehow make it a less Godly place.

This is truly affirming and inclusive.  This is what the Church SHOULD look like. People should be able to attend, as themselves.  People should be able to bring their whole lives into the worshipping community, and they should be able to offer their time, talents and gifts for the Kingdom.

This is a far cry from being allowed to attend ... quietly ... without standing out.  A far cry from having to sit next to your partner, with no sign of affection between you, of pretending to be somebody else, so that people don't make you feel like a novelty or like an inferior Christian, because you're not able to overcome this modern 'affliction' of homosexuality.  People should be encouraged, affirmed, blessed & encouraged to belong as WHOLE people, so that they can better be who they were created to be.  We can't force beautifully created people into boxes that more easily fit our moulds.

This is what inclusive church looks like ... and it's utterly normal, and perfectly fabulous.

Here's a few pictures from the day ...

Where the service of the Word takes place. 

The octagonal space in which communion is celebrated.

A montage of some of the wall panels.

Pause a moment in the Pink Triangle Park ...

If you're in the Castro, in San Francisco, take a moment to pause in the Pink Triangle Memorial Park.

It may not be large, or groomed, and sits right next to a busy road, and many seem not to be aware of it as they focus their attention on the bars, restaurants, cafés and stores, but it's a good reminder of how far we have come and how far we have yet to go in the pursuit of freedom and equality for LGBT people.

I don't think I could say it better than the Pink Triangle Park's own website, so - with apologies - I'll just paste the text from their website:

This is a civil rights park.
The 15 granite pylons rise before you in remembrance of the estimate 15,000 gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transgenders who were persecuted imprisoned and killed during and after the Nazi regime. 

Throughout history, there are times when prejudice overwhelms all reason and humanity. Such was the case under the Nazis. But even after the Nazis' defeat, the discrimination against the LGBT community continued, using Paragraph 175 of the penal code. Briefly freed from concentration camps by Allied troops, those prisoners wearing the pink triangle were returned to finish their sentences. Those who survived two imprisonments emerged as second-class citizens even under democratically elected governments.

Pink Triangle Park and Memorial is a place of remembrance, reflection and education - a physical reminder of how persecution of any individual or single group of people inevitably damages all humanity.

Here are a few photos from my visit earlier this evening.

San Fran, a city on the edge ...

Before arriving in San Francisco, I was a bit concerned that living here for a month would leave me a little bit like a fish out of water, as it's very different to visiting a place, to immerse yourself in the culture.  But I've had a lovely time, and all being told, it seems to be a city that's used to embracing strangers.

I suppose the city has a history of embracing people who had fled as far away from government authority as they could, and San Fran is as far West as they could get, without actually donning some swimming trunks.  The city has a history of picking people up, welcoming them, and including them.

Most people here are friendly, which is interesting to a cynic like me. I was originally worried that I would find people's enthusiasm and friendliness a bit much, and didn't want to be a killjoy, but that hasn't been the case, either.  It's felt perfectly natural to be responding to people's friendliness and warmth with the same.

The city's attitude to inclusion is astounding, and you can see elements of it everywhere ... in the 'LGBT Safe Zone' poster in the Mission SFPD station window, to the 'End the hate' posters in people's windows, the rainbow flags displayed in all sorts of public establishments, big brand stores and private residences, and the "Equality for all" messages displayed on the LED screens on the outside of Muni buses.  It seems to be a city that acknowledges all citizens as equals, with rights and as part of the community.

It seems even the resident's attitude to the homeless is friendly, and reciprocal. Time and again, when I've not had any change to give to a homeless person, this is met by a courteous, "Thank you, and God bless you."  The only aggression I've seen so far is in arguments between homeless people on the street, which have appeared to be alcohol-fuelled (or some other substance).

I know there is a hard edge to the city ... the degree of homelessness, the drug culture and the strong odour in certain parts gives testimony to that.  But, there's a hard edge to just about every city.  But it feels like what San Fran is doing right, is it's regard for all it's citizens, even those who would fall through the cracks, and in many cases, have already fallen through the cracks.  The challenge in what I have seen is that being friendly and welcoming, although so much better than in other cities, still leaves room for improvement.  True inclusion should extend to affirming the humanity in each person, and in giving them the opportunities for self-improvement, so that they can regain and retain a sense of pride in themselves.  This may be very well be happening, and I wouldn't want to offend anyone by suggesting that it isn't ... it's merely an observation.  I wouldn't want it to detract from the fact that I've been blown away by the level of inclusion in this city that is on the edge in more ways than one ... On the edge of the USA, on the edge of social thinking, on the edge of current policy, on the edge of both poverty and wealth, and more.

I've already made mention here of how the Church here has blown me away in terms of how active they are in seeking inclusion, and can certainly give churches in the UK a run for their money. In particular, my observations refer to the Episcopalian Church, and I've seen how they don't just operate an open-doors policy here, but they actively go out to recruit from minority groups, and then include and affirm them. The local Bishop has also been quite instrumental in fighting to get the government to repeal DOMA and to bring back Equal Marriage.  So, it was quite something to march in Pride with a group of Episcopalians who could genuinely show Pride in their ministry, themselves, and their LGBT brothers & sisters.  In my visit so far, I've visited Grace Cathedral (which there's more about in previous posts ... here, and - in particular, my impressions about their current art installation - here) and St. Gregory of Nyssa, both a vibrant ministry to the whole community, including the homeless, the LGBT community, and others (St Gregory's even hosts a weekly food pantry, which offers fresh produce and groceries to over 1,000 families). Grace Cathedral have released a public statement, rejoicing in the decision to allow Equal Marriage in California, and inviting couples to book their same-sex marriages in the Cathedral.  These are good examples of how church should defend the minorities, support equality, be a voice for the voiceless, and affirm the humanity of all!

I should add that there have been other churches ... The Sierra Pacific Synod of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America shared in our Eucharist at Pride and have a very important ministry around issues of social justice & minority groups. There was even a group of Catholic worshippers, marching in support of Equal Marriage (although, sadly, by all accounts, this does not extend to their senior clergy or diocese, which seems to be quite active in opposing equal marriage ... here and here ).  However, it seems the call for Marriage Equality amongst Catholic worshippers is growing, and hopefully their leadership heed it sooner or later!)

I hope to attend worship at St Gregory's this Sunday, and may even stop by afterwards at a Bring & Share picnic in Dolores Park.  I've even spotted that there's an open photo shoot for the NOH8 campaign next weekend, which I'll go to and try and join in!

That's about as much as I can manage in terms of an update today.  San Francisco is turning out to be quite an exciting city to get to grips with ministry and inclusivity ... what felt like a long month in the city is rapidly turning out to be a rather short space of time to fit everything in.  I'll just have to visit regularly. ;)

Reflections on "Graced with light" by Anne Patterson, in Grace Cathedral, SFO

I've already reflected on my experience of a service at Grace Cathedral, and a little bit about the art installation they have there at the moment.  You can see that here.

Yesterday, I went back to Grace Cathedral, to see the finished artwork. Art is interesting ... hubby will tell you I'm not much of an art connoisseur (euphemism is strong in that statement). With me, all art falls into one of only two categories; Art I like, and art I dislike.

When Mike & I go to galleries, we have to agree to divide and conquer, and we meet up in the café at the end, as we proceed at very different paces. Mike likes to admire, digest, study, understand and remember the art ... he can often instinctively tell who an artist's influences were, what techniques they're using, and whether they were ground-breaking in their techniques, style or subject. I, on the other hand, only know if I like it or not. If I like it, I'll go over and admire it ... occasionally, I may even study it.  If, however, I don't like a piece, I'll move immediately on.  I can't spend time looking at something I don't like, regardless of who it's by, how important it is as a piece, or how much it's worth.

I wouldn't dream of rushing anybody through a gallery or museum at my pace, so Mike gives me the freedom to rush through, and I give him the freedom to take his time.  If either of us sees a piece we want to show the other one, we'll go back and find the other.  Often, I enjoy the galleries themselves more than the art they contain, and I'll spend time watching the flow of people, looking at the architecture and the lighting.  Occasionally, because I'm fascinated by security (thanks to my Dad's former career), I'll study the security measures in place, and see if I can find any improvements that can be made.

______________________________________________________

Anyway ... that's all a massive aside.  Getting back to art I like vs. art I dislike. Art, like liturgy, speaks in different ways to different people, and what the artist intended isn't necessarily what the viewer perceives.

'Graced with light', by Anne Patterson, spoke to me in many ways. I don't know if any of them are as she intended, but I offer my impressions of it as a piece.  In short, I loved it. I spent hours studying it, photographing it from different angles (I even tried a little video with sound, but couldn't figure out that function on instagram). I've been to study it twice now, and will probably visit it again before I leave.

One of the reasons I love it is because it's made up of so many thousands of individual strands, which speak to me of community, of the strength of the whole being made up of it's individual parts, rather than about a single piece of art.  This is even more the case, because the community has been involved in putting the piece together, in helping to cut and hang each piece of ribbon.  All of this speaks about the value of each individual in the community, rather than the value of the artwork.

Looking up at the individual ribbons making up the completed piece.

Another reason I love it, is because it contains a range of different colours, mixed together.  There is no segregation, no separation into order, no attempt at conformity.  This speaks to me about the beauty that diversity brings to the whole. It speaks to me of the value of diversity, inclusivity & affirmation, and how the community is richer and more beautiful for it.  The fact that the ribbons are constantly fluttering with the airflow around them speaks to me about the freedom of each individual (ribbon) to be and having the freedom to move.

The third reason the installation particularly spoke to me, was the title "Graced with light," combined with the light shining on the ribbons from above.  This highlighted their differences and their beauty, rather than attempting to hide it in a dim space.  This particularly spoke to me of the value of celebrating differences and diversity, rather than hiding them, or expecting them to conform.  In particular, one phrase that entered my mind was, "If you see the world in terms of black and white, you need to step into the light".

I love it as a piece, and as a community project. I love what it says to me, and I love that it's backed up by what we experienced when we attended the Sunday service.

This is, however, just a blog post, and I encourage you to go and see the real thing while it's up.  It may not speak to you in the same way as it spoke to me ... there's much here that is about my personal journey.  But it is very much worth seeing.

To close, two montages of images I collected during the day.

It's the little things ...

I stumbled across this sign yesterday, in the window of a local police station ...

Like many other things in San Francisco, it made more of an impression than I thought. It struck me that it's a very small thing ... I little laminated sign in a window ... but it adds to lots more small things that make a big impression.

This is a city that, through hardship, has had to recognise that all people are equal, and that all need to be affirmed and included.  Deeper than that, all need to be VALUED and PROTECTED.  Many of our civil services, institutions and authorities now state (because the law requires them to), that they will accept LGBT  people.

However, acceptance is quite passive, and implies that there's something to accept, because you wouldn't ordinarily be acceptable.  You accept change, you accept hardship, you accept that occasionally you may have to put up with people you don't like.  Acceptance does not say, "I value you," or "I celebrate you," or "I  love you." It says, "I'm willing to put up with you."

It's an entirely different thing to recognise LGBT people, not as people who won't go away, but as valuable members of your community, with gifts and talents to bring, that are - not just welcome - but NECESSARY.  To send out a message that says, "You are OUR people, we love you and we need you."

This is not about worrying about people flaunting their identity in your face, or worrying that they will appear too 'Gay' (or Bi or Trans or whatever), or that they will have questionable morals. This is not about any of that.  This is about people having the freedom to be themselves without fear, about people feeling valued as valuable members of society, about people being respected members of society, about people being able to love and live, about BEING.

True inclusivity is not just acceptance.  We need to go further than 'allowing' LGBT people into our communities and our churches.  We need to go looking for them, we need to invite them in, we need to celebrate them, we need to use their gifts and their talents, and protect them as our own.  That is inclusivity.

And, by the way, this would be the same for any institution ... I'm not picking on the Church ... merely mentioning it, because that is my context.

San Francisco Pride - a day to feel proud!

Today, I had the pleasure of marching in the 43rd San Francisco Pride with the contingent from the Episcopalian Diocese of California.  I had been both looking forward to-, and dreading the day, in equal measure.

I have shared before that it's been a long time since I felt proud to be an Anglican ... the last time was probably as a teenager in South Africa, when I first became politically aware of the injustice of Apartheid, and saw the Anglican Church fighting against Apartheid, and also electing Archbishop Desmond Tutu as it's leader.  Then, the Anglican Church I worshipped in, spoke out for minority groups, supported them, defended them and fought for their full inclusion and for their lives.

I can't remember feeling that same sense of lasting pride since then, and have often reflected that I feel shame about being an Anglican, and about affiliating with and serving an institution which has become so synonymous with the exclusion of the LGBT community in the UK, that it's difficult for the inclusive voices inside the organisation to make themselves heard, because people have stopped listening.

We all approach every situation in life with our previous experiences that have shaped and influenced us, and these guide our emotions.  And so, I rejoiced at having the opportunity to march today, but was nervous about over-identifying with a denomination I've become wary of, regarding it's dealings with the LGBT community.  I could not have been more wrong in this case, and in many ways, today I began to feel a certain pride at being an Anglican again.  I was welcomed into the group, met some folk and was generously given a pair of rainbow wings by a member of the clergy, which added some much-needed to colour to my plain black clergy outfit. ;)  I also met Diana Wheeler, of Oasis (the LGBT Ministry of the Diocese of California) and Sister Eden Asp, of the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence.

My wings :)

Me with Diana Wheeler & Sister Eden Asp

The day started with an open-air Eucharist (Mass) in Beale Street, in front of the Greyhound station.  When the Right Revd. Marc Andrus opened the service, he welcomed all to the day, and shared that he had chosen to wear a red stole (liturgical scarf), rather than white (for celebrations), because he was mindful of the martyrs that had gone ahead of us in the fight for equality & justice.  He then reminded us that, although equal marriage had come back to California, there was still much to be done in the fight for equality and freedom for all, and called us to join him in committing to marriage equality, to commit to voter rights, to commit to equality for minority groups in other nations and to commit to the planet and to tackling climate change.  Very poignant, relevant, right and refreshing words.

We all joined together in singing All Are Welcome (by Marty Haugen), which caused a few to wander over and join in for the rest of the service.  After the readings, The Right Revd. Mark Holmerud, Bishop of the Sierra Pacific Synod of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America, preached about how marriage equality was long overdue, and offered his thanks for those who helped with the struggle.  He reflected on the theme of this year's pride being, "Embrace, Encourage, Empower" and offered three other words; "Comfort, Control & Commitment".  He mentioned that equal marriage opponents were no longer comfortable, wanted to regain control and were committed to removing equal marriage again, but that it was our calling to help them understand that they haven't lost anything, when everyone has gained so much.  He finished by calling us to go out to love, to encourage, empower and embrace.

The service continued with the prayers, the peace, and the breaking and sharing of bread & wine, and finished with the words of the blessing:

Live without fear; your Creator has made you holy,
has always protected you, and loves you as a mother.
Go in peace to follow the good road and may God's blessing in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit be with you always.
Amen"

The beginning of the Pride Mass 

Bishop Marc Andrus during the Eucharistic prayer

After the service, we prepared for the march (a little prematurely, as it was around a 4-hour wait after the service, before we got to start moving in the parade), but it presented the opportunity to meet more people, find out their stories and share mine, swap contact details and make final adjustments to the bus.  In the end, the wait was that long, that the heat began popping the balloons on the coach.  But, amazingly, people stuck it out.

I managed to chat to Bishop Marc Andrus and his wife, Sheila, about their ministry to the LGBT community, and their role in the fight to help bring Marriage Equality back to California.  It was both humbling and encouraging to meet church leaders that were that committed to the full inclusion of the LGBT community that they not only opened church doors, but actively fought for their equality & inclusion.

Me with Bishop Marc Andrus and Revd. Thomas Jackson 

The Front of the bus

When we did finally get to march, it was all over in a bit of a rush, but people were fantastic. The emotions we saw on people's faces as we marched in front of them ranged from surprise, to elation, to amusement. We were cheered, applauded, waved at and asked questions about the Diocese of California's commitment to perform marriages for Same-sex couples.  Several people asked me if I would marry them, but I had to confess that I was only visiting briefly, but that I'd love to come back if they invited me to attend.  Some people in the crowd pointed to a cross they were wearing or a T-shirt with a slogan about God, and applauded us, and the impression I got was that they were rejoicing that finally they, too, could bring their faith to the table and share that with their other LGBT friends, and didn't have to separate their faith identity & their sexual identity in front of us.

Again, I think today made more of an impact on me than I thought it would, and will stick with me for years. The powerful witness and potential of an inclusive church should not be undermined.  I suppose the challenge to the people out there is, when they find an inclusive church, attend it, and support it, because without that, they struggle to survive ... the churches that exclude the LGBT community are often very well funded and attended, but we need to be supporting the much smaller inclusive congregations, to get them to grow, and flourish, and witness about an inclusive faith.

A couple of things stood out for me today ...

• In my conversation with Bishop Marc Andrus, we reflected on the state of affairs in the Church of England, and I mentioned that one of the big differences, was that the Church of England was sometimes ACCEPTING of the LGBT community, but that that did not mean the same thing as WELCOMING them. And Bishop Marc went even further and said that there's a big difference between WELCOMING and INVITING.  Inclusive churches can be found in the UK, but the Church of England seems to lack voices that are actually going out to the LGBT community and inviting them in, and welcoming them, and affirming them, and allowing them to bring their gifts and identities into our worshipping communities.
  
  There is such a massive difference between accepting (a very passive thing), and actively inviting and welcoming, that I could write pages.
  
  If people are invited, welcomed, affirmed and included - as themselves - they are encouraged to bring their gifts, they are energised, they are empowered, they are transformed, they bring their gifts to the table, and the community around them is enriched & grows.
  
  If they're merely accepted, they *may* walk through the church doors, but they will keep their private lives and their identities hidden from those around them, and - as a result - they can never be full members, because they are not allowed to be full.
• The second thing that really struck me, was when we marched by the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence, and they thanked the bishop and the clergy for working so hard for the LGBT community. That really brought a tear to my eye, and made me proud - for today - to call myself an Episcopalian.

Full-colour Pride

I'm trying to reflect on my first day at Pride, and finding it quite difficult.  I was quite emotional this morning, while walking around the Civic Centre in San Francisco, and I'm not sure why.  It's not like I haven't faced all of my own demons, and come to terms with who I am. I am comfortable in my sexuality, my faith, and my identity.

Still ... it was that positive an experience, being surrounded by literally every outfit, shape, colour, size, height, gender, sexual orientation or gender expression, where everyone was comfortable, interacting positively and affirming of each other ... that I found myself close to tears a few times.  The rest of the time, I was wandering around with a grin on my face.

I saw Trans people, drag kings and queens, people wearing nothing, some guy wearing a single gold sock (not on his feet), goths, families with kids (dressed in rainbow colours), people in tutus, people with body painting, people wearing masks, people holding hands, dancing together, commercial sponsors affirming their customer base (no doubt for financial impact, but still positive and more than many commercial enterprises do), religious groups interacting in a positive and affirming way, and equal rights campaigners.

I'm guessing that some of my more conservative Christian counterparts may struggle to be exposed to someone wearing a gold sock, or even see the naturism stall, but none of it came across as sordid.  It wasn't about sex ... it was about variety, about expression, about identity and about acceptance.

Again, it seems to be highlighting to me how important it is that we not try to force people to separate their personal identity from their working or worshipping lives.  That fragments people and causes wounding and stress.  When we allow them to be whole in every sphere, they flourish, and as a result - our communities and our faith communities can flourish, too.

I reflected with Paul, an Episcopalian priest, the other day, that for many years of my life, I approached prayer and my relationship with God as an imperfect straight man with something to be ashamed of and to hide.  When I decided to change that, and approach God as a gay man, thankful for the gift of my sexuality, and learned to relate to God as a gay man, it was a profound moment of watershed in my life, and a real marker in my own healing process.

If we allow people to come to worship as themselves ... with their partners, their whole lives, then they can truly be who they were created to be!

And I haven't even moved on to the afternoon in Mission Dolores Park yet ...

The gathering at Mission Dolores was a warm-up for the San Francisco Dyke March towards the Castro.  It ran all day, with the march beginning around 6pm.  I got there at around 3.30pm and the first thing that struck me at Mission Dolores, was the large number of people ... I think estimating in excess of 30,000 would not be far off the mark (although my counting ability is impeded by a lack of attention span ... 1,2,3,4,5,10 ... lots!).

Again, there were people of every shape, colour, size, gender, gender identity, gender preference, sexual orientation, culture and race.  They came on foot, on crutches, in wheelchairs, on mobility scooters, skateboards, stilts, inline skates (and electric bicycles!). The noise was incredible, but everybody was happy.  People were picnicking, catching up with friends, sitting with families, making new friends, buying food, dancing, raising awareness of campaigns & community groups.  It was called a Dyke march, but it was equally well supported by gay and straight men, straight women and trans men & women.  Again, people were wearing (or not wearing) all sorts, but the focus seemed to be on celebrating being together as a community.

The celebrations seemed heavily influenced by the recent ruling on Equal Marriage in California, and people were happy to gather together and rejoice that they had a future.  That's almost too heavy a concept to type quickly ... how different the atmosphere would've been if the ruling had been different.

Again, I was struck by the sense of joy, affirmation and community. It seemed that even the homeless were enjoying the event.

I waited to see the beginning of the march, and then - having spent the day surrounded by SEVERAL thousand people - needed to retreat to a coffee shop for some quiet time to reflect.  I keep coming back to that thought that it is so very important to allow people to bring their whole selves to every part of their lives, so that they can experience every part as a whole, and give themselves as a whole to every part, and be WHOLLY human.  It is deeply wrong for any faith community to adopt the attitude where they force people to leave their private lives behind closed doors, and attend services quietly, without people knowing who they really are, lest it offends a few.  So very deeply wrong.

Here's a few pics from today ...

He was giving away free hugs.

People as far as the eye can see

Drumming group leading the parade onto the streets

The start of the parade towards the Castro

Grace in Grace cathedral

Mike and I went to the 11.00 service at Grace cathedral on Sunday, 23 June.

The cathedral, a replica of Notre Dame, currently has thousands of 84 foot lengths of ribbon suspended from the ceiling, which have been prepared by the local community, and present a visual image of inclusivity and equality. The ribbons will have shades of red added this week, expanding even more on this theme, as all the colours of the rainbow hang from the rafters, in time for Pride weekend.

This equality is further represented in the congregation, which included a range of shapes, incomes, colours and sizes, and also a number of same-sex couples, which both felt and looked perfectly natural. The importance of this cannot be underestimated, as it meant that we didn't feel out of place, or that we had to pretend we were friends in case it offended somebody. We could attend a service together, like any other couple, we could worship together, hold hands and receive communion together, and this was just a normal thing. We had the freedom to be a "couple that pray together"!

The sermon was given by Revd Winnie Varghese, and made reference to equality and equal marriage.  It felt both perfectly natural and totally right to be hearing about Equality for all human beings in a church setting, and it struck me how wrong the Church (with a capital 'C') has got it, when it's only in a small number of communities and congregations that all people are welcomed, included, affirmed and blessed.

It's such a small thing, but it made a big impact on us to be able to feel at home, not as two individuals, but as a couple, together ... even moreso because it was the first anniversary of our Civil Partnership registration.

With thanks to the Very Revd. Dr. Jane Shaw for her and the cathedral's hospitality, and to Revd. Winnie Varghese for an inclusive sermon.

The start of the story

I'm about to start the travel section of my Sabbatical, and am more nervous than excited.

The reality of spending 6 weeks away from home, in a strange country, on my own is fairly daunting. You take a number of familiar things for granted ... knowing where to find groceries, where is safe and not safe to walk on your own, where to go to have time to think ... All of the little things that you know in your home town.

It'll be a wonderful experience, and I'll get to meet lovely people, I'm sure.

For now, I need to get everything into my bags and make sure I've got all my travel docs ... To quote Ab Fab, "Tickets, money, passport!"

Inclusive faith groups need you ...

It never ceases to amaze me how much money is apparently around to both sponsor, and be made from, bigotry and bigoted causes.

The language used by organisations that support bigoted views often claims to support what is holy, sacred, or core to our values as a society.  They use scare tactics and a series of untruths to attempt to label those they're seeking to oppress and to gain support and finances from people who don't wish to see their lifestyle or value system threatened.  In my opinion this is less of a faith issue, but more of a power issue, and occasionally a financial issue.

By contrast, the groups that seek to promote full inclusion often work with very limited budgets and payrolls, but work very hard.

This is especially true in the case of so-called faith groups fighting against the LGBT community.  There are plenty of groups working very hard to fight the full inclusion of LGBT people, to campaign against marriage equality & marriage equality in faith communities, and most recently - often campaigning for bills which allow discrimination on the religious grounds.

I don't believe the answer to fighting bigotry in faith groups is to silence the voice of faith. If we allow ourselves to go down that road, we effectively silence all faith voices, including those fighting hard to bring full equality and inclusion.  People of faith who believe in equality for all often speak out in favour of full inclusion at the risk of their careers, and sometimes even their homes and families.  If we're to bring change in faith communities and have faith communities that affirm and include all and advocate for equality, we're going to need to support them and help them find their voice. If we give them back their voice, it removes some of the power of the oppressive groups that seek to silence everyone that doesn't submit to their control.

I wish to draw attention to some of the groups working for the full inclusion of the LGBT community, in faith groups, in society, in law and in our culture.  They need your support, your time, your gifts and talents, your prayers and your donations.

Faith Groups

• LGCM - the Lesbian & Gay Christian Movement.
  Find out more about them here
  Donate to their ministry here
• Changing Attitude - Changing Attitude works for the full inclusion of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people in the life of the Anglican Communion.
  Find out more about them here
  Donate to their ministry here
• Two:23 - an evangelical Christian with a LGBT inclusive ministry
  Find out more about Two:23 here
• Diverse Church - Diverse Church is a supportive community of 250+ young 18-30yo LGBT+ Christians, predominantly in UK evangelical churches. They aim to be a pastoral/mission resource for the wider church.
  Find out more about them here
  
• Inclusive Church - working for a church that is welcoming and open to all, and also holds a directory of inclusive churches nationwide.
  Find out more about them here
  Support their ministry here
• Accepting Evangelicals - Accepting Evangelicals is a open network of Evangelical Christians who believe the time has come to move towards the acceptance of faithful, loving same-sex partnerships at every level of church life, and the development of a positive Christian ethic for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people.
  Find out more about them here
• Metropolitan Community Church - a global inclusive church movement
  You can read more about them here
  Find their Western European & United Kingdom ministry groups here (you can support their ministries on their respective pages)
  Support their global ministry here
• Matthew Vines' Reformation Project
  Matthew is a remarkable young man. There are plenty of people who have explained the theology behind inclusive Christianity, but Matthew is perhaps the first to make it available in a YouTube video, in the form of an hour-long lecture, that provides a brief summary of all Scriptural views of homosexuality. Matthew's page is here.
  This video, and it's growth in global popularity, gave rise to a ministry by the name of
  The Reformation Project - a Bible-based, Christian non-profit organisation that seeks to reform church teaching on sexual orientation and gender identity.  Read more about this ministry here.
  The Reformation Project is only available in the USA for now, but is hopefully coming to the UK soon.
  Support Matthew's Reformation Project here.
  I'm hoping to get the chance to meet Matthew at some point over the course of my Sabbatical, but obviously time-permitting for both of us.

Community / campaigning groups

• StonewallProbably the group many people think of first when thinking of a group working towards equality for LGBT people.
  Find out more about Stonewall here
  Find out about the many ways you can support Stonewall here.

This list is not exhaustive, but a brief introduction into a few of the groups I've had the pleasure of being in contact with - and supporting - over the last year or two.  The people in these groups are extremely hard-working and dedicated, but they desperately need support - in whatever form you can offer it - to continue to fight for equality for the LGBT community in our government and in our faith communities.

I regularly tweet about Equality and Equal Marriage (although not exclusively) ... you can follow my twitter feed here.

Let the Sabbatical begin!!!!

At the close of today's working day, I officially start my Sabbatical, or Extended Ministerial Development Leave, as it's now called.  As clergy, this is something we get every 10 years since ordination (more or less, depending on Diocese).  As my ordination to the Diaconate was in 1999 and to the Priesthood was in 2000, I'm a few years late.

We get the opportunity to take 3 months or so (again, it could differ from Diocese to Diocese), to look at study activities or life and faith experiences that will feed our ministry or our lives for the next ten years.

For some of my Sabbatical, I'll be enjoying spending time at home with my hubby, Mike, but I'll also be spending a large chunk of time in San Francisco in the USA, where I'm hoping to link up with various LGBT community and church groups, to look at good examples of inclusive ministry, in both the secular and religious communities.  I've already made a contact with a few people in local churches there, and also in Grace Cathedral.  I may look at attending services at one of theses, and also at observing some of their groups/meetings/people.

I'm also excited to have made initial contact with the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence.  Their story interests me, because what most people see is a group of cross-dressing men, in nuns habits, on in-line skates, but I think it's much deeper than that.  They sit between two communities who often don't see eye-to-eye, i.e. the LGBT community and the religious community, and they've adopted the language and uniform of one, to do charitable works in the other.  I hope I do get to meet them, and I'm looking forward to finding out what their experiences of both communities have been, and where their story started, and whether any lessons can be learned from them. In addition to all that, I think they'll bring some much-needed humour to my Sabbatical time.

I hope to be blogging / tweeting / photographing while I'm away, so do please follow, comment, feed back.  If there are any people in the San Fran area that want to link up, I look forward to hearing from you.

At the end of my time in the USA, I'll be returning home, a weird mix of exhausted & exhilirated, and hope to have many tales to tell. :)

To close ... here's a pic of me on my ordination day.

My ordination at St Stephen's, New Brighton, in the Diocese of Port Elizabeth - 30 September 2000.