Trinity Sunday

Parish news insert I wrote for Trinity Sunday:

The news this week seems to have only gotten worse. It reinforces what I
mentioned last week that it is absolutely vital that we stand together as
human beings, leaning on each other and offering each other love and
support.
This is backed up by our second reading this Sunday, in which we're told
to agree with one another, to live in peace and the God of love and peace
will be with us.
A poem that I have received a lot of inspiration from this year, is one
written for the Holocaust Memorial Day.

HOPE FOR THE FUTURE
Pledge for National Holocaust Memorial Day 2008
Everyone has a right to be free,
Where there is no freedom for others,
There is no freedom for me.
Everyone has a right to be different,
Where there is no respect for difference,
There can be no respect for me.
There is HOPE for a safer future if I protect liberty,
If I RESPECT others,
Others will RESPECT me.
© Roger Cliffe-Thompson, Liverpool Poet
With warmest blessings,
Andy

Trinity 1 - why worry?

My column for the parish newsletter for Trinity 1:

Our gospel reading for this morning contains some great advice, which I
only wish I could follow.
Worrying is what I do - it's not a preferred pastime, but one which I have
become rather good at over the years.
However, I like to think that I've gotten a little better at recognising
those things that aren't worth worrying about, or that worrying about will
not actually make any easier.

For example, last week I worried a lot about what to preach on Trinity
Sunday, but when I discovered on Trinity Sunday that I was in the vestry
at St. Mary's and my sermon notes were in my study at home, I didn't
really worry at all. The one I could do something about, the other not.
Perhaps that's a good place to start - worry only about the things that
are worth worrying about. Perhaps we should do less worrying and more
planning.

I think there is great wisdom in recognising when worrying will not
actually help a situation at all, and in knowing how to let go of those
worries. Worrying about your speed in a traffic jam, worrying about
whether or not you'll have a job in 5 years, worrying about whether we'll
have sunshine over the weekend, worrying about whether or not someone
likes you - I could go on and on ? these are all examples of futile
worrying.

However, to stretch the metaphor a little, what we can do is try and avoid
heavy traffic routes, or keep performing well at work and looking for
opportunities to add more skills to our CV's, or have a plan B in case it
rains, or work to earn someone's trust and friendship - these are all
perhaps ways in which planning can be beneficial, while worrying can't.
That way there SHOULD be less to worry about, but I know that that's not
always the case, either. Being absolutely in control is not often
accompanied by low stress levels.

I guess this is a prime example of a delicate balance that we only really
begin to learn about with experience and the wisdom that age brings.

And there I was, worrying about getting old!

Pentecost Parish News Insert

Here's a column I wrote for this week's Parish leaflet:

The news this week has been rather sobering.  We have heard about tragic loss of life in Burma / Myanmar, the ongoing election nightmare in Zimbabwe, the surprise eruption of Chaiten Volcano in Chile … there are so many to choose from.

In our first reading today one phrase leapt out at me … "they were all together in one place" (Acts 2:1).  It reminded me that there is strength in numbers.  It also reminded me of the African phrase of "Ubuntu", which is roughly translated as "I am, because we are" … a sense that a community and a society is only as strong as its individuals, and that each person is responsible for the well-being of the community which – naturally – includes them.  So that every act that an individual performs for the benefit of the community benefits them too – albeit indirectly sometimes, and every act that an individual performs that harms the community harms them too.

We are reminded, too, in our second reading that "just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ" (1 Cor 12:12), which this morning I would like to use in the context of community again.

It strikes me that, with the scale and number of disasters we are seeing now, what we really need to be doing as humans, is supporting each other and standing together.  Not judging each other on nationality, gender identity, faith, creed, political affiliation, income bracket, accent, ideologies or any other such thing.

It is vital that we become a people that focus on our similarities, celebrate these, and support and act for the good of each other.  I believe it is when we begin to do that that we see true transformation of communities and individuals, and the Spirit of God can truly begin to work and to renew.

Happy Pentecost

Lent 2

The third in the series:

Lent 2

After last week's snippet, it occurs to me that perhaps next year I should give up meetings for Lent.

It seems that in the Christian and Secular spheres, we often have people setting up meetings for the sake of it.  We have meetings to discuss ideas, meetings to discuss meetings; we even have meetings to ensure that the meetings remain in our diaries.  Sometimes, we have that most blessed of all – the duplicate meeting.

Meetings appease our conscience – they make us look busy, give us a sense of accomplishment and can help us gather others around us to make decisions we don't want to accept sole responsibility for.  Meetings can be hugely beneficial, and often are, but sometimes I do wonder how many of them are needless duplication.

The trend exists in the Church (with a capital 'C'!), but it does have to be said that the trend exists outside the Church, too.  In other organisations and institutions, we sometimes see the infamous 'Update' meeting creeping into our diaries.

I wonder whether the purpose of many of our meetings is clear to us, or whether it is to enable us or others to feel busy.

We do like to be busy and to look busy – in our faith and in our careers.  It gives us something to measure, some way to validate how we spend our time.  I wonder how much time we clear in our lives to enable us to reflect and be silent.  That's not as easy to measure or to feel good about, but arguably much more beneficial.

Perhaps that's a second challenge this Lent, or for a future Lent … Can we allow ourselves some space to reflect on our faith, our families or our careers? Or is that me trying to give the time a purpose again?  Can we simply allow ourselves some time without anything to do?

Can we allow ourselves to not schedule a meeting, but merely spend time alone or with others, for their- or our sake?  Rather than investing in our timetables, can we allow ourselves to invest in ourselves and our relationships – whether they are work or personal?

Lent 1

The second in the Sunday newsletter inserts for February:

Lent 1

In 1993 I was doing a year of missionary youth work in the Northern and North Eastern areas of the old Transvaal province in South Africa – now the Limpopo and Mpumalanga provinces.  There was a group of 6 of us from all over the country and we stayed in a house which doubled as the Diocesan Offices.  The Diocesan Treasurer had a 1-bedroomed flat in the back garden and occasionally shared mealtimes with us.

During Lent that year, we asked the Diocesan Treasurer what he was going to be giving up for Lent, and he responded that he was giving up Church!  We all thought he was joking – until he never arrived for the first Sunday in Lent … or the Second, or the third, or any services in Lent.  True to his word – he only came back to church on Easter Sunday.  We initially thought it rather strange, but at the end of Lent, we saw a changed man.  From Easter, that Diocesan Treasurer found that – rather than dragging himself out of bed and grudgingly sitting in Church – he loved going – Lent had both transformed him and transformed his experience and understanding of his faith.

I realised then that Lent was about more than just giving up something … it's an opportunity to spend time looking within ourselves, at what makes us tick, and identifying the areas where we can make positive changes.

I'm not suggesting that we should all give up church for Lent.  But for that Diocesan Treasurer in 1993, Lent was an opportunity to evaluate what his faith meant for him.

The challenge for us this Lent is not to think about what we can give up, but to find out how we can make Lent a time for positive change for each of us, and perhaps for us as a community.

February Newsletters

I've been asked to do a bunch of letters for the parish newsletter for February, and I thought I'd stick them here as well.  Should be fairly safe, as no one reads this. ;o)

Here's the first, written for the first Sunday in February:

3 February

It's the end of January and already the year seems off to a rather shaky start.  I hear from colleagues at the university, friends and family about personal and, sometimes, tragic losses experienced in the post-Christmas period.  Students are struggling with post-Christmas homesickness, dwindling student loans, assignment deadlines and exams.  Then there are the news headlines, about a potential recession, not to mention 'wars and rumours of wars'.

A recent article in the Guardian mentioned that Thursday last week (January 24) was apparently the most depressing day of the year. This was calculated by Cliff Arnall of Cardiff University, using an elaborate scientific formula.

So if you're feeling a little off-colour after Christmas, it's nice to know that at least it's perfectly natural, so we don't have to add guilt to all of the above.

But what can we do about it?  It's good to remind ourselves about what we do have … homes, families, friends, food, life.  Look for the signs of spring and new life … the earlier sunrises and later sunsets, the flowers in the lawn, the buds on the trees.  Find and encourage the positive in others, especially our nearest and dearest … say something positive, do something for them, pamper each other a little, book a meal out or cook a meal in, watch a film together, enjoy a lazy cup of coffee together in the afternoon sun or perhaps plan a day out together.

And, remember, too, in the words of our Psalm this Sunday "The Lord of hosts, he is the King of glory" … our God is loving, welcoming, unchanging, victorious, accessible, forgiving and eternal.

Are you looking for Jesus? How about Jesus in pink flock?

I stumbled across these beauties at a store this week. They're selling flocked Jesus' & Marys. I'm not sure what I find more bizarrely humourous ... the fact that someone's produced these in flock, the fact that they have a slot between their shoulder blades you can fit coins in, or the fact that Jesus and Mary have apparently reversed genders. While images of Mary in blue are commonplace, I must say, it's the first time I've seen Jesus in a pink flock.

What a daring (albeit tacky beyond belief) theological statement.

Feast your eyes on these babies!

At last Fred Phelps gets his come-uppance!

At last, Fred Phelps and his deluded cult have got their just reward for spreading hate and promoting extremism.

In today's Newswatch email from the Bible Society,

"ROGUE CHURCH ORDERED TO COMPENSATE SOLDIER'S FAMILY
An independent church that pickets US soldiers' funerals claiming their deaths are a punishment for American tolerance of homosexuality has been fined $10.9 million. Grieving father Albert Snyder sued the Westboro Baptist Church after members demonstrated at the funeral of his son, Marine Lance Corporal Matthew Snyder, who was killed in Iraq. The church – composed largely of members of its leader's relatives – regularly attends military funerals waving banners declaring 'God hates fags' and 'Thank God for dead soldiers'. A Baltimore jury ruled that the church had violated the family's privacy and deliberately inflicted emotional distress."

Sources: The Guardian (1/11); The Times (1/11)
http://www.guardian.co.uk/international/story/0,,2203227,00.html
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/us_and_americas/article2783974.ece

In my opinion, they should be pursued and forced to pay.  They've done nothing but spread grief and cause emotional turmoil for grieving families, and forced their hatred on others when they are most vulnerable.  Perhaps a life of working to pay off $11m will quiet them down enough to enable them to rethink.

Thank God for a healthy faith approach to sexuality

This is a greeting from Archbishop Emeritus Desmond Tutu for the beginning of the 2006 Out in Africa Film Festival.

If only more people practised this approach, rather than religious bigotry, how much better would the world be?!

Empowering

Preached this sermon in St. Peter's, Maybush on 9 September 2007. St. Peter's is a gorgeous little church, with some charming Art Deco features (most notably the leaded windows and the light fittings), and very welcoming congregation.

Philemon
Lk 14:25 – 33

• Rather than the Gospel, I’d like to focus on the reading from Philemon this morning
• Because it lends itself well to a theme that seems to be occupying my thoughts a lot of late … namely the theme of inclusivity and affirmation.
• In our Philemon reading, there are 3 main characters; Paul, Onesimus and Philemon. The letter is written to Philemon – afriend of Paul’s, while Paul himself is in prison, about Onesimus.
• Why was it written? That’s not immediately apparent simply from reading the text, but is rather to be found in the background behind the text. That’s also where it becomes quite an interesting story. Onesimus was once Philemon’s slave. To make matters more interesting, Onesimus had stolen from Philemon and then run away … matters which clearly were not befitting for a slave.
• Onesimus ended up where Paul was in prison, and was of assistance to Paul, and so Paul writes the letter to Philemon, encouraging and affirming him first, but then asking him that he do welcome Onesimus back, but even more, welcome him as a brother, not a slave. So he was asking for Philemon to not only forgive Onesimus, but to free him.
• A bit of a tall order, perhaps?
  
• But, then Paul saw something in Onesimus that others couldn’t see.
• He recognised Onesimus’ potential and sought to empower him to reach that potential.
• And do we know exactly what happened to Onesimus, after Paul’s act of kindness? We do know that Philemon forgave and freed Onesimus and welcomed him as a brother.
• After that, things are not as clear. Some scholars believe that he is the same Onesimus that was consecrated Bishop of Ephesus by the Apostles years later.
• We do know that Onesimus has since been sainted by the Roman Catholic, Eastern Orthodox and Lutheran Churches
• But who knows where he would’ve ended up without someone who saw him, not for what he was, but for what he could be?
  
• Our Lord was an empoweror as well …
• He had a small band of misfits as followers.
• I like to think of them as the gang that weren’t…
• The weren’t glamorous enough; they weren’t literate enough or learned enough; they weren’t wealthy enough; they weren’t articulate enough; they weren’t respected enough; they weren’t strong enough; they weren’t brave enough; they weren’t wise enough; they weren’t charismatic enough…
• And yet … He believed in them!
• And look at the outcome of that relationship!
  
• Our Lord is an empoweror to us as well.
• He believes in our potential, and wants us to reach that potential.
• Are we empowerors to those around us?
• Do we see the potential in others, or do we simply see what they do wrong.
  
• I think, sadly nowadays, people are far too aware of what other people do wrong, and not able to see the phenomenal potential of the other person
  
• And so, we are faced with two challenges this morning;
• Firstly, how we can reach the potential that our Lord sees in us; and
• Secondly, how we can affirm and empower others to reach their God-given potential
• The reality is that we don’t live in an affirming society … we’re bombarded with messages and media that tell us all the negative things about ourselves and our lives:
  Our young people are disrespectful, not to be trusted and lazy
  Our children are not clever, sporty or well-behaved enough
  Our young men and women aren’t fit, attractive or glamorous enough
  Our parents aren’t wealthy or cool enough
  Our partners aren’t considerate, romantic or attractive enough
  We’re not thin enough, rich enough, beautiful enough
  The list goes on
• We’re bombarded by negative messages about our lives, our society and our loved ones.
  
• Sadly, the picture is not much better in many of today’s churches, were too often people are made to feel badly about themselves because they’re not modest enough, conforming enough, pious enough, regular enough in attending worship, giving enough to charity or the Church, “Straight” enough or perfect enough …
  … to be welcomed into the Church
• We see far too many churches and church leaders focusing very hard on who they can exclude, in order to protect their exclusive members’ club, rather than on who they can include, to grow it’s sense of family and community and also it’s numbers.
  
• We see a very different picture in our Philemon reading this morning, and we see a very different example in the life of our Lord.
• We have been given “Good News” after all!
• We have been freely welcomed and should be freely welcoming all to share in that good news.
  
• So back to our challenges…
• How can we welcome, include, affirm and empower others, in order that they may reach their potential, rather than being dejected, rejected and excluded?
  
  There is an old story that is told about an army (which is the actual collective noun for frogs!! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_collective_nouns_by_collective_term_A-K ) of frogs that went hopping through the forest one day when two of the frogs suddenly fell into a deep pit. All of the other frogs gathered around the hole to look down on their two fallen comrades. They all began to sadly shake their heads and to croak out dismal warnings. “It’s too deep!” croaked one frog. Another frog croaked that there was no way that they would ever be able to get out of that pit alive.
  The two fallen frogs began to continuously jump as they tried to get out of the pit, but the frogs that were watching kept croaking louder at them that they might as well stop because they were as good as dead and just wasting their time. One of the two frogs finally gave up and heeded the pessimistic advice of the frogs at the top. He quit leaping and literally “croaked” and died. The other frog just kept right on jumping and leaping harder than ever in spite of all the loud croaks of disapproval from the frogs around the top of the hole. They kept croaking shouts at him to quit jumping and save himself from all the pain and suffering he was incurring as he leaped and fell back down to the bottom of the pit over and over again. Finally, he jumped even harder than ever and to the surprise of all the other frogs he leaped right out of the deep pit. The other frogs asked him, “Why did you keep leaping even though we croaked and yelled at you to stop?” It was then that the frog explained to them that he was deaf and he had thought they were cheering for him and shouting words of encouragement to him the entire time!
  
• Our words and actions have the power to help others to rise above where they are and achieve their full potential.
• We need to not stop at what we can see, but rather to ask for the grace to see what each person’s God-given potential is. Then we have to WORK hard at keeping that up, because it can be easy to resort back to judging and belittling them when we don’t see them living up to their potential.
• We need to remind ourselves of the grace we received, and of the fact that they are God’s beloved, perfect in His eyes.
  
• The second challenge we had was how we, ourselves, could reach our potential.
• This is, for many of us, a harder challenge, partly because we’re so accustomed to seeing our negative points. We’ve been conditioned to do so … it’s how businesses sell products to us.
• So, it’s vital that we extend the same grace to ourselves, that we’ve just discussed extending to others.
• We, too, are perfect in God’s eyes and perfectly loved.
• We, too, need to realise this, ask for the grace to see this, and then ask for help to affirm this within ourselves.
• And we could try spending a bit more time with people that affirm us, rather than those that judge us (making sure that we return the favour).
  
• Amen

Good News for all the earth?

This is a copy of my sermon from Sunday Last:

Gospel: Luke 14:1, 7-14

Interactive introduction (for a church set out with tables and chairs, rather than rows of seating - if church is in rows of seating, adapt as necessary):

Approach front table, and lay with plates and wine glasses. Pour Bucks Fizz (or sparkling wine / champagne, if your finances can support it) into the glasses. Light some candles. If you have any eats for them, lay those out as well.

Then ask the congregation whether or not they mind if you go ahead at that table, and that it's unfortunate that they weren't seated at that table. Tell them you only have enough for the one table, but you're sure they'll understand. Proceed with the celebrations at that table.

Talk:

· Ask the congregation how they felt when they realised they weren't going to receive the same treatment? Ask if they felt it was unfair or not?

· Then return to the pulpit (if you need to clear the table, you can do it here, or perhaps later on in the service, during the peace).

· I'd like to tell the story about a young girl. I'm not sure of the origins of the story ... I was given it in email many years ago.

It's the story of a little incident that took place in Mainz in 1456 when Gutenberg was printing the first printed Bible:

The printer had a little daughter, Alice, who came into the printing press and picked up a discarded sheet with only one line of print. That line of print read: "God loved the world so much that he gave..." Now, those were times when popular religion was a matter of living in fear and trembling before the awesome wrath of God. So Alice put the paper in her pocket and kept on thinking of the fact of God being so loving, and her face radiated with joy. Her mother noticed her changed behaviour and asked Alice what was making her so happy and Alice showed her mother the sheet of paper with the printed line. Her mother looked at it for some time and said, "So, what did God give?" "I don't know," said Alice, "but if God loved us well enough to give us anything, then that is enough - we need not be so afraid of Him."

· And that's the point!

· We're meant to share in and share 'Good News'

· God loves you and me so much that He gave ...

· And yet ... that's not currently the message that we see many Christians sending out!

· Something has gone fundamentally wrong with the Church, with a capital "C"

• It's become more obsessed with moral policing, with who's in the "in" crowd and who's in the "out" crowd, than with telling people the Good News of God's love.
• Gospel means Good News. In the modern Church, we don't have a Gospel anymore ... we have doctrine.
  
  

· IF the Church is the Body of Christ, then how does the world out there ... Joe & Jane Bloggs in the street, your neighbours, the youngsters in the pubs and clubs ... how do they see the Church?

· Well - we're forcing them to regress back to a medieval understanding of God as the big Eye in the sky, watching and judging everything that you do.

· The impression we're giving them, is that if you're married, with 2.5 children, which are all in faith schools, you have a mortgage, a good job (but only one of you - the other must stay home and parent), you tithe on your good income, you belong to a midweek Church group of some sort, you primarily listen to Gospel music, you don't swear and you own your own DVD copy of The Passion of the Christ ... then you're definitely in.

· While the contrast is also true: If you're very rich, you're out; if you're very poor, you're out; if you're divorced, you're out; if you're a single parent, you're out; if you drink or smoke or use any other substance, you're out; if you're gay / lesbian / trans-gendered / transsexual / transvestite / bisexual, you're definitely out; if we can't understand your accent, language or culture, you're out; if you're in any way mentally or physically different, you're out. There's no room in the Kingdom for your sort - God is perfect and does not tolerate imperfection.

· It's abhorrent, but sadly it is the image that far too many churches are sending out to the general public.

· (Directed at the people who were at the fortunate table) How did it feel when I was laying your table? (Directed at the rest of the congregation) And how did it feel when you realised you were not going to receive the same treatment?

· It may be helpful if you mentioned personal experiences relayed to you of people being kicked out of a church, or excluded, for some reason beyond their control - perhaps a beggar, a young person, a gay person, etc..

· And yet?!

· The life of Jesus tells us a VERY different story

• He didn't spend time with the dogmatists, he didn't spend time with the legalists, and he didn't spend time with the socially comfortable, the pious or the acceptable...
• He was out on the streets with the scorned, the excluded, the outcasts, and brought them inclusion, hope and love.

· That's why we call it a Gospel; because it's Good News

· And we're instructed to share Good News with people,

· NOT to turn God into a malicious playground monitor.

· That's what Jesus was about

· That's what our Gospel is about

· That's what our Faith is about

· That's what today's reading is about

· We are called to share the good news that all are welcome and that all are included.

· That's why we share communion - it's an opportunity for everyone to join in the meal around the table.

· I'd like to share the words of a poster I saw on the wall of an St Columba's House, in Woking, Surrey, UK:

Beware!!

Here we practise the inclusive Gospel of Jesus Christ!

This means you may be mixing with tax collectors, sinners, adulterers, hypocrites, Greeks, Jews, women as well as men, female and male priests, homosexuals, lesbians, the disabled, the dying, thieves and other sinners; even Black people, Asians and other ethnic minorities, Muslims, Bishops, bigots, people of other faiths, strangers from Rome and Nigeria, heretics, etc., etc..

And yes, even you, dear guest, are most welcome.

In fact, anyone like those who Jesus mixed with.

So beware! This is not a private club! Welcome to all!

· And so, let us close with the words of the hymn (which I know may be politically incorrect in it's use of the word 'men', but I simply quote as it was written):
"We have a Gospel to proclaim
Good news for men in all the earth ..."

· Amen

© 2007. A. Marshall

Reflections on pride ...

OK ... so being something of a 'late developer', Saturday's Brighton Pride was my first Pride Parade, even though I've been in the UK now for 5 years. I've normally been working for every other Pride Parade (in every other city in the UK).

I knew it'd be fun, which it was, but it had such a warm community feel to it, as well. It felt like an entire town, and it's residents and businesses and institutions, gathering to celebrate the diversity of life. People came out with their kids, their babies in push-chairs, their parents and grandparents.

In the parade, there were commercial floats, community floats, religious community floats (from the Lesbian and Gay Christian Movement, the Quakers and the Salvation Army), floats by the forces and the emergency services ... and it was a wonderful celebration of the diversity of life and of acknowledging each other's differences, yes, but it was more than that ... it was celebrating similarities ... we're all in this together. It was great.

Although few, it was particularly great to witness some religious input into the parade. Well done to the Salvation Army, Metropolitan Community Church, the Quakers and the Lesbian and Gay Christian Movement. I'm glad that at least some people have realised that the Gospel is 'Good News'. There are way too many organisations and movements that are focused on belittling people, undermining their humanity and mocking the wonder and diversity of God's creation, by trying to force people to comply to their limited understanding of religion, and not enough people attempting to include people in the spreading of 'Good News'! We are, after all, called to share the Love of Jesus Christ with the world, not to exclude and judge.

So, hats off to all those from religious communities that marched in Brighton on Saturday, and to those that march in other parades world-wide. I really should look at joining them.
I'll include a selection of photographs.

Taraaa, and stay fabulous!

Look at all the people in Preston Park!

And some very theological accessories

How long did he collect feathers for?

I love the fruity hat!

The fire brigade ... fabulous!

It says, "We feel that the quality and depth of feeling between two people is the most important part of a loving relationship, not their gender or sexual orientation. http://www.quaker.org.uk/ " Hooray for the Quakers! ;)

The Metropolitan Community Church float

The Lesbian and Gay Christians and their friends. Praying for an inclusive Church, indeed!

Free gifts?!

I got into work this morning, to discover some 'kind' soul had sent me a free book. My own view is that items that are given to you for free are often worth the money you paid for them, and that people who give you free books are generally the type of people who believe that they have something worth saying, not necessarily the type of people who actually have something worth saying.

Well ... the book came in an unmarked envelope, with no return address, no letter ... nothing. We're off to a winning start. Then I opened the envelope, and discovered a book, titled, "Heaven. Close Encounters of the God kind," by Dr. Jesse Duplantis. Oh good ... someone sent me a comedy.

I took the book to a colleage, and we sat reading it, discovering it to indeed be a comedy ... we laughed so much, I couldn't speak and she was practically on the floor.

It's hilarious. Naturally, he's from the deep South, and naturally, whenever he sees God or goes to Heaven, there's never anyone else there to see it. But, there are some interesting undercurrents ... he's always visited by male figures, who are always tall and handsome and powerful, and often blonde, and a lot of the visitations happen at night. I think therein may lie some of the real reason for all his visions. A good laugh. LOL!

I'll put a few of the best opening snippets here.
___________________________________________________________________

"Popcorn Came Flying Out of That Steering Wheel!"
Now it's an amazing thing the way God knows how to prove things. As the car flipped over, and the steering wheel broke in my hand, up out of that steering wheel, I saw popcorn coming! Then, Bam! That popcorn started hitting me! I said, "Ohhh, look at this popcorn," just flipping.
When I came to a stop, I tried to get out of the vehicle as best I could, but I was jammed inside it, hanging upside-down. Thank God there wasn't a fire during that wreck. I could have been burned alive!
People stopped to help.
The car had to be cut open with a welding torch before I could be pulled free from it. Then I was put into an ambulance and rushed to hospital.
I kept hollering, "There was popcorn in there! Popcorn!" I said, "Listen! Somebody grabbed me! Somebody's hand was on my shoulder! I would have died otherwise. I was flying."
My mom and dad were called from the hospital. When I got on the phone, I said, "Mama, I've been in this accident."
Amazingly, she had driven right by that accident, but she didn't know I was in the ambulance she saw going the other way. She had said to my dad, "There was a terrible accident. Let's pray to God no one died."
After finding out I was okay, she asked, "Did you feel anything in that car?"
I said, "Mama, popcorn came flying out of the steering wheel!"
That went right over her head, and she said, "Besides that."
"Mama, I felt like somebody had grabbed my shoulder."
Immediately she said, "That was the tidal wave of the blood covenant in the dream I had the other night! God was protecting you! He was holding you down in that car so you wouldn't die and go to hell! You had better thank God that I'm praying for you, boy!"

___________________________________________________________________

We were just about wetting ourselves. Who is this guy? Can someone from the Beeb interview him about that popcorn? Whatever substance he's on, I want some ... popcorn coming out the steering wheel ... brilliant!!

Or, how about this snippet ... he was asked to stop in at hospital in Lafayette, Louisiana, to pray for a guy's daughter, and he drove there from Monroe, Louisiana (oh yeah ... did I mention he's from the South in the States? Figures ... LOL!) ... a distance of about 180 miles.

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I Had Been Translated!Then I started thinking about my trip, trying to figure out what happened. There I was in Lafayette! You can't get from Monroe, Louisiana, to Lafayette, Louisiana, in only thirty minutes. It can hardly be done by jet, much less by car.
"Listen, brother," I said, "I'll see you later. I've got to go."
He was crying, "Thank you, Brother Jesse!" (I found out afterward that he checked his little girl out of the hospital two hours later.)
Then it began to register on me what had happened, so I called my wife. I had talked with her right before I left my friend's office in Monroe. This time she said to me, "Hey, where are you?"
"Cathy, I'm at a pay phone in Lafayette. Look at your watch."
Then she said, "You really made good time, honey. Well, hurry on home."
I wanted to scream, "Listen, woman, and hear what I'm saying!" Then I wanted God to zap me again, so that before she could even hang up the phone, I would be home. (But He didn't do it!)
When it dawned on me that I had been translated, I thought, If I've been translated, then I didn't burn any gas. When I turned on the ignition switch, I watched as the fuel gauge went all the way to full! I just cried out, "Oh God!"

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I wonder if this is a viable way of lowering our carbon footprint?

It's amazing, isn't it, how this guy is translated, visits heaven, speaks to God, has God visit him in his bedroom at night, but never with any eye-witnesses. He is yet another self-proclaimed prophet, claiming that his writing and account is valid, because he says it's valid.

He does repeatedly get to see really tall, handsome, blonde men, though. In fact, there's a lot of mention of men visiting him, and speaking about wonder and desire. I wonder if there's some message in that.

LOL ... so thank you to whomever sent me the book. I haven't laughed that much in a while.

Thought for the day?!

I've been asked to put together a thought for the day ... which in itself is no big deal.

The trick is, I've been asked to put together a thought for the day for a secular group on a staff away day. That's a little less straight forward, because I suddenly need to be aware of all sorts of policies about inclusivity and equality. I can't even poke fun at my faith, in case someone else takes offence at it. And so, here I sit, at 00h30 (after the pc crashed @ 00h10), none the wiser.

I thought perhaps I should say something briefly about the latest attempted bombings in Glasgow and London, addressing the dangers of extremists, using the name of religion to excuse their own violent agendas. But then thought that that was potentially rather meaty and depressing for 09h00 in the morning.

Then, I thought that perhaps I should address the issue of the whole rebalancing that the institution is undergoing, with several staff posts being designated as 'at risk', but that wouldn't be fair to them if they were there, and people would probably want to forget about it anyway.

There is, of course, the growing and desperately important problem of climate change and global warming, but as I have no answer - only tips - that's not that great an idea either.

Then I thought that perhaps those are all a bit dark and sombre first thing in the morning, anyway, and perhaps people need to relax and have a bit of a giggle, but as I mentioned above - it's difficult to know what you can joke about, without risking offending someone. I was going to read the opening chapter from 'The Bible According to Spike Milligan', but am not entirely convinced.

So, I'll mull it over a while longer, or maybe just head to bed, unconvinced and unprepared (I hate that).

What I did find, however, was a really nice blog or article from a reformed homophobe. Take a look at http://anitra.net/activism/glbt/sodom-essay.html . It's so refreshing to find someone that isn't gay, that acknowledges that they were wrong and helps promote the truth. It's a really good, thought-provoking and intelligent read, and I commend her. When it's not the middle of the night, I may write and thank her for her insights.

I give up ... if anyone has any suggestions on a "thought for the day" for a staff away day for people of mixed cultures and faiths in a secular institution, please comment below ... there are bound to be more (unless I make a royal cock-up of tomorrow, in which case I'm off the hook in the future).

Cohesion in the Community

Went on a cohesion conference, arranged by Southampton City Council, on Friday. The title of the conference was 'Developing cohesion in diverse communities'.

I do need to add that I wasn't that keen, having just spent two days out of the office, on Extenuating Circumstances panels, but I was glad I did go. Ted Cantle, the keynote speaker, was brilliant and informative regarding cohesion in communities as a whole, and also what was happening nationally.

I had chosen to attend the 'Understanding faith and cohesion' workshop in the morning, which was good, but I probably got more out of the afternoon session I had chosen, 'Cohesion and young people'.

The afternoon workshop was run by a group called Peacemakers, who started in Oldham, with a simple aim, "... to create opportunities for young people to meet and befriend other people from different communities and ethnicities. These youngsters used their informal networks and youth club contacts to try and promote a climate of multicultural growth in their hometown," (taken from their webpage). It helps young people to focus on commonalities, rather than differences, and encourages them to establish a common British identity ... something we don't often see nowadays, with so many people focusing on and promoting differences.

What they were doing was so simple and so refreshing and in line with what I've thought for ages: you can't force people to share personal information and hope that they will establish relationships as a result ... you need to provide people with the opportunities to establish relationships, and as a result they will share personal information, and eventually ... life. It was good to see how much of an impact they had made, and were making, and how that was being recognised and empowered.

One of the successes of their programme is that they empower the young people of the communities they get involved in to continue with the programme, and so the initiative continues to live on beyond when they leave.

Take a look at their website (although it may take a while if you don't have broadband, as a lot of it is flash with animation and video).

I did also have a brief chat with someone from the Royal South Hants hospital about their current and future building work, and offered some advice on the reordering of their chapel ... hopefully a resource we can keep in the area.

And so, all in all, although it was another day out of the office, it was useful and inspiring.